The Potato Headed Evil Of Andrew Neil

03.08.23

Yesterday, the potato headed human ballbag Andrew Neil authored an article for the Daily Mail in which he announced: ”Why I’m proud to be a ‘TERF’ and join JK Rowling on the front line of the gender wars”. 

You might know Andrew Neil from his political program ‘The Andrew Neil Show’ on Channel 4, or his brief stint on GB News before he realised how much of a reeking doggy turd it was and sprinted back to terrestrial. Anyway, in his article, Neil prosthelytizes about the empathy he apparently feels for a detransitioner he saw speaking before congress. Like many dunderheads of his kind, he’s decided that the misfortune of a stark minority is enough to seemingly warrant a complete overhaul of transgender healthcare. He makes sure to use the officially sanctioned buzzwords ‘mutilation’ and ‘barbaric’. He then goes on to reveal the harrowing details of tales he’s heard from his fellow soldiers in the ‘gender wars’: 

“One woman showed me evidence of threats to 'come to your house' and 'rip the nipples off your bare chest'. Another was promised a 'night of the long knives'. And there's much worse than this. It's simply unrepeatable in a newspaper.”

Of course, the deranged trans activists are to be associated with Nazi imagery, and not those who’s modus operandi seems to be the complete exclusion of trans people from public life. Neil goes on to say: 

“There is a growing suspicion that many of the young people currently suffering from what's called gender dysphoria are simply gay and that, if allowed to come to terms with their sexuality with help and counselling, will turn out just fine.”

Which is an interesting comment from someone who during their time as the editor of the Sunday Times apparently backed a campaign which spread dangerous misinformation about the spread of HIV/AIDS. 

Neil uses his apparent ignorance toward feminist issues as an anchor to rest false apologies on, and appeal to the sensibilities of anti-trans extremists, who hardly represent the vanguard of modern feminist thought. What I’m saying is - what the fuck does Andrew Neil know about any of this, exactly? 

Interestingly, I am represented by the same agency as Andrew Neil. Recently, while at a schmoozy, networking mixer I embarrassingly mistook his bloated head for a jacket potato and was directed to the mini quiches instead. I watched him as he circled the room at Bafta HQ. Later, I stood outside vaping, all networked out, as he passed me, had his photograph taken and disappeared into the London streets. I felt a cold chill as he passed me, as if the personification of evil itself had just come into contact with my soul. What horrors exist within that giant potato of a head? What incomprehensible terrors exist behind that starchy face? 

Neil ends his article with an exquisite piece of White Knightery that’d make Graham Linehan blush: 

“I'm ready for the further abuse that awaits me for siding with such company. Frankly, it's water off a duck's back. And it's never as brutal against men as it is women, which speaks volumes for those dishing out the abuse.”

If you say so, Andrew. In that case, let me be the first to say this: 

You’re fooling nobody, you rotten jacket potato headed sack of overripe pumpkins. Maybe spend less time obsessing over trans people, and a bit more time explaining how you got into Epstein’s little black book. 

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