Iโm going to a funeral today. Itโs my auntโs, who we lost to cancer a few weeks ago. Itโs going to be a bit of a rough day.
I realise itโs not a particularly hot take to say that I donโt like funerals, but I donโt. They make me sad, and Iโm already sad, so it can be distressing to be surrounded by other sad people, who are all being sad together, which makes you even more sad - because itโs sad when people are sad.ย
I do think funerals are important. Theyโre a ritual, and they give us permission to grieve together and draw some sort of line under the trauma of the death. But, I also think that they arenโt for everybody. Personally, Iโm not sure how much they do for my grief - but then again, maybe itโs not about me. Itโs an opportunity for all the family and friends to meet up, without having the guilt of calling it a party. I think a funeral is a party though. Except, itโs a party where everyone has to pretend it isnโt a party, because that would be inappropriate. But it is a party. A sad party. And for me, most parties are sad parties anyway.
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